| Note to self |
[Oct. 15th, 2005|03:20 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  chipper | ] |
So Airell and I went swimming the other day... And by swimming, I mean skinny-dipping. It started out fine, then...
It was a good time.
Today Airell and I met Raylene down at the Bocatt. The excitement was that a 'catt followed her into the cantina. We got most of the blood up but I took a few pictures before we got the body out. Never had one follow someone inside a building before.
After that little fiasco, Raylene played us some songs on the stage. Moon and Daofi joined us, and I had a chance to dance. Her little droid produced smoke effects, which looked great coming off the stage. I think I really like Raylene. There's also some talk that Jaeron might have a crush on her. That, or he downed some spice. But Jaeron's too respectable for that. Unlike my lovable bastard of a boyfriend, who has few qualms about anything.
So life progresses much as it has, with new faces coming into the guild all the time. It's been a good season so far. |
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| And then he kissed me |
[Sep. 5th, 2005|10:19 pm] |
Something's happened to Airell and me.
We were on the ridge after taking a couple odd jobs, just star-gazing and talking--like we used to do so often.
We were there all night, watching the celestial bodies take their course across the dark sky, the occasional purple cloud obscuring the view.
Airell told me I was beautiful--like he often does--and I said I could never leave him. He smiled softly then, but said he was always afraid I'd outgrow him. But how is Ka'va Ka'va without Airell?
Dawn was breaking, but we were quiet. I was cuddled up against his chest, leaning against him staring upwards. Then it clicked. I understood that Airell loved me--loved me like that. I know we both felt the tension.
He said he loved me, looking at my eyes. I knew what he meant but I asked him involuntarily, "Like a sister?"
"Is that what you want?" he said. I could see something in his countenance I couldn't place.
I didn't know what I wanted. I hadn't understood until now.
We walked back to my home. It wasn't far, but it was late morning before we got back. I was tired and limping a little, so I took the day to rest. Airell was about to leave, but I asked him to take his boots off and come back to bed and hold me while I fell asleep--as he usually does.
We stayed up talking a little while longer, my head on his chest and his arms around me. He told me everything. That he'd loved me--deeply--for years now.
I didn't know what to say so I said nothing.
Airell's been my comrade, my brother since I was a girl. He's protected me, cared for me, chased off anyone who showed even a remote amount of interest in me. He bought me and freed me without expecting anything of me in return. He could have kept me bound to him and I wouldn't have thought any less of him for it.
Looking back, I knew. I must've. He's been by my side for years now. I can barely sleep without him near me, holding me. So why do I still not understand what this means? Is it that I don't want anything to change? I've never let myself think of him that way before. Sometimes thoughts would creep into that place between a dream and reality, but I'd push them away. It didn't seem appropriate. But I'm not a little girl anymore and I'm not a slave.
It's hard to grasp that Airell, of the upper strata, would fall in love with a serving girl. But that's what makes Airell so different--better, really--than his family.
He'll always be Airell--my impractical gentleman of a scoundrel.
I've needed him in my life. I do love him.
The next night, I kissed him.
We had gone back to his place for the night, and got into bed--after I changed his sheets. I refuse to sleep on muddy sheets. It's like he doesn't even take his boots off. But that's Airell.
We hadn't really talked since last night when I had been silent. There still weren't really words, but they weren't needed. We kissed softly, lying next to each other. Airell said he'd dreamed of this. In my mind, this was what I wouldn't let myself dream but for what my heart yearned.
I've... I've never had that kind of real physical contact before. I know Airell's had other women in those wild years when he was away from me, but he's been right by my side since he freed me. He's only wanted me.
He told me that no matter what I wanted--a brother, a friend, or a lover--that that's what he'd be for me. He wants me to be happy.
I love him. I can't help it. |
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| Seasons come and go |
[Sep. 2nd, 2005|06:23 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  thankful | ] |
"Home" is increasingly becoming the place where Airell is. I missed him terribly while he was gone. Of course, I busied myself with staying out of trouble--or something like that.
I suppose the biggest news is my hip. I finally took the time and credits to visit a doctor. The science is a bit beyond me, but she fixed whatever was wrong. So now I have two good kicking legs! I think Airell is more excited about the fact it's easier for me to dance again--which, of course, I've been doing more of. I spend a good deal of time searching for clients in cantinas anyway, and cantina hopping is a good way to make some extra credits and find clients. I'm not above dancing for tips.
Otherwise, life has been much the same. I've run into Gri'Moss more than a couple times, often with a drink in his hand. I also believe the Kora will be returning in the coming weeks after a long trip to Ryloth. Oh, and Alebe was not drafted by the Imperials after all! He'll be staying on Tatooine. Of course, he also has to set up shot again and move back into the city. I must say that I value knowing when my friends are safe since they so rarely are.
Shaggy the bantha and the nameless one--the cu pa--are also doing well. I'm glad they have each other. They've been rather friendly considering how different they are. The bantha (big as he is) is such a baby. He loves having his chin scratched. |
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| Me and Airell |
[Jun. 28th, 2005|06:53 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  content | ] |
After Pampi's rescue, a tired Airell walked me home. I got ready for bed and he came back into my room with me to tuck me in. As hot as the desert is it can be almost chilly at night. Before I knew what I was saying I asked him to hold me. He didn't seem to believe I had asked, and I felt as though I had said something wrong. "I'm cold," I said, and he finally obliged. His arms were warm and could hear his heart beat as I lay my head against his chest. We'd had such a long night I think I started to fade in and out without meaning to. It didn't help that I was so snug cuddled against him.
I think I dreamed Airell sad something to me that made my heart swell, but I still can't remember what it was.
When I woke at dawn, it took me a few minutes in his arms to realize he didn't belong in my bed with me. Airell's never been an early riser, so I slipped lightly out of bed without him noticing. I'm taking this time now to write and to cook us breakfast for when he finally wakes up.
I have to admit I slept better last night. It's the first time I'd seen him since he'd been away and I missed him terribly. I think part of me was relieved he stayed with me through the night. I'm not sure I could bear waking up with him gone and having to wonder if he'd even been here at all. I'd had enough of that in my dreams these last few weeks... |
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| Pampi's abduction and Gri'Moss's introduction |
[Jun. 28th, 2005|05:23 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  relieved | ] |
Quite a bit has transpired as of late.
The gathering went well enough, even if it was just an informal catch-up time. Airell had not yet met Moone in person, so they were introduced. Of course Pampi was there, and Daofi and Alebe. Kasumi, who I had not yet met, was there for a shoert time as was new friend of mine, Evita. A Bothan I'd met a while ago was poking around the city, but he left after peeking into the cantina.
Afterward, Airell and I went back to my house so I could show him some of the things I bought while he was away. While I was in the back changing, a client, friend, and fellow image designer Rikochet stopped by. I introduced them and mentioned that Ariell was like a brother to me. Airell chimed in, glaring at Rik, and said, "An overprotective big brother." I rolled my eyes, but he didn't see it. Airell isn't very subtle about his feelings towards Zabraks. At any rate, he scared Rikochet off. We were having a nice chat when we heard sounds of a scuffle near the Bobcatt. When we went to investigate, the recovered datapad contained the remains of a message. Something about "Moss...snatch Pampi...Wayfar...should be dancing..." At any rate, Airell and I met up with Alebe in Wayfar and sure enough we found Gri'Moss, the Bothan from earlier, drinking in the bar. I won't detail the entire conversation, but it came out that Moss was a down-and-smuggler turned small time thug. He'd been hired by Pampi's former owner to bring her back. Let me reiterate that this is the man that muted and nearly killed her and that Pampi is a legally free woman. On the way from Da'Vinci to Wayfar they pair was jumped by Tuskens and Pampi taken prisoner. Moss asked who she was and why we cared so much, and it eventually came out she's Asiche's girl. At that, Moss was taken aback. As it turns out, Moss was a former employee of Donde Stelo, Aisiche's father, and knew Asiche when he was young. When he realized what he'd done, he vowed to help find her. He swore to die if we found Pampi dead. We still didn't trust him, but he knew more about where Pampi had gone. The four of us met up with Daofi back in Da'Vinci and then it was on to Fort Tusken. Alebe stayed behind but provided us with a V-35 landspeeder.
Daofi led us into Fort and we made short work of any opposition. We found Pampi's lekku wrap, but no Pampi. Upstairs, we found a note: "Asiche, I love you but I had to run."
We didn't see a body so we hoped against hope she made it out of the Fort. Airell and Moss went toward Mos Espa on foot, Daofi went toward the Jawa settlement and I went North, both of us by speeder. It was Moss and Airell that spotted the trail of blood. We all come back and followed it. Along the way, Moss found Pampi's silver bracelet. We finally found an unconscious Pampi on a ridge. We rushed her to Mos Nihil in the V-35. She woke up a bit during the journey and called out for Asiche. It was heartbreaking. Daofi called ahead to the Med Center there and Alebe soon came as well.
After a few tense moments, I felt Pampi squeeze my hand. She was going to be okay.
Moss pledged his life into Pampi hands and compassionately determined he would stay with the House--though Aisiche would have the final say. Since Pampi was okay to travel, we shuttled back to Da'Vinci.
I'm sorry for the lack of detail, but I wanted to get down the basic events while it's still on my mind... |
|
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| A venture worth mentioning |
[Jun. 26th, 2005|01:55 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  hopeful | ] |
So it seems Pampi, a guildmate, and I have launched a business venture. Since I am an image designer and she a tailor, we are able to provide complete makeovers to clients. We set up in the Bestine salon for an hour or two, and in that time we had several customers. I rather enjoyed it; it felt like we were really rendering a service. I think more people would get their clothing custom tailored if they could find a tailor more readily.
At any rate, it was great to get to know Pampi better. We spent the down-time talking about our pasts, and most of her story was new to me. The company was refreshing as it can get lonely waiting in the tents.
Airell should be home any day now, he thinks. I'll be waiting and watching...
The gathering tonight should be very productive. We hope to discuss the direction of the city, maybe even hosting some our own events to help encourage tourism. Besides all that, it'll be nice to see many of my friends again. We all seem to roam pretty far in the galaxy. We all lead such different lives. |
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| A tale |
[Jun. 20th, 2005|11:19 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  melancholy | ] |
So I got myself into something of a scrape a few days ago.
Business has been pretty slow and with Airell gone it’s been a bit quiet. Anyway, I got a call from a familiar client, another Twi’lek named just Lalya. To get to the point, she needed the favor of having a double. She didn’t volunteer much information and I certainly didn’t ask, but I gathered that she’d gotten into some shady dealings and had been forced to double-booked herself. The situation was such that she couldn’t afford to…anger either party. After all the trouble Airell gets himself into I was up for a little of my own and I agreed—for the nice sum she offered in advance.
“It’ll be easy enough,” she said. “I’ve been faking laryngitis for a few days now--you won’t even have to talk. I just need you to drop off this package—don’t ask what’s inside, you don’t even want to know—make your excuses, and leave. Don’t worry; I’m not going to set you up. I’ve got too much to lose if I break this deal.”
I know that I should have backed out right there, but I’ve never had to do this kind of work before. It should be a real test of my skills.
The drop was in some two-bit town on Corellia (that isn’t even on the map), so we went to Moenia on Naboo to make the changes later that day. People seem to care less what happens in Moenia…
Her skin was a foamy green and her lekku had a flowery pattern in a darker green. After finally color matching eyes, skin, lekku, and makeup—you can’t forget makeup—we moved on to the more difficult body changes. She’s a bit less chesty than I am, and much taller and a bit less muscular. Using the terminals in the salon removes the element of pain from the process, but performing such large changes never feel good. It’s a tight, stretchy feeling—a dull aching until you feel you’re about to break and then it’s done. The last thing that was needed was facial reconstruction. Her lips and jaw line are wider than mine and her eyes are smaller, more rounded. This part is my least favorite. I’m not sure why, but facial changes always feel like thousands of pins pressing into your skin all at once and never break the skin. It was over in less than a second, though, and thank goodness. She gave me a black robe to wear as well as a black bone crest. I must admit that I did good work on myself. We were almost perfectly twins.
I’d been watching Lalya the whole time, trying to mimic her gestures and the peculiar sway of her hips when she walked. She tended to put her weight on her left leg when standing and twist her right-hand wrist—but never her left—when talking.
“What else do I need to know? Names? Faces? Should I act like I recognize these people?” I asked.
“I’d recognize them. You’ll be met by a Jhent Gant, my contact’s second in command and his bodyguard Janus. I’m sure you won’t have a problem telling which is which. Gant is a Bothan and Janus is a human, both male. Janus has this huge scar above his left eye. Gant has a squeaky voice. I don’t know much about them other than that. They’ll recognize you by sight, but toss your lekku twice before knocking on the back door of the cantina. Don’t worry, they’ll see it. You’ll be fine, really. They’ve always been nice to me because I get them what they want on time.”
We left separately after she downloaded the coordinates to my datapad.
I had no trouble finding the place. It was one of the only buildings in the area besides some houses. I tried not to be nervous going in, but doubt did cross my mind. Airell would absolutely die if he knew I was doing this. So got to the door, satchel containing who knows what in hand, and did the double lekku toss and knocked. Janus—it must have been Janus because of the scar—met me and escorted me down the hallway without a word. He held the door at the end of the hall for me, though, and smiled. I wasn’t sure what to do, so I smiled softly with my eyes. It seemed appropriate, anyway.
The windowless room to which he led me was bare except for a wooden table and a corner lamp. The walls were metallic and cold.
“You got it, right?” asked Gant, in the most unattractive voice I’ve ever heard in my life. Ii was all I could do not to wince. I nodded and extended the package to Janus’ open hand.
“You still sick?” The Bothan’s voice was cracking. I nodded again. “Jan, is it all there?”
Janus rummaged through the sack and obviously found what he expected. Inwardly I was relieved. I rubbed my throat and indicated I was leaving. Gant nodded. “Jan, show her out.” I shouldn’t have turned my back him. He pulled a blaster and tried to fire but missed at what was nearly point-blank rage. He was too eager to shoot—no wonder he needed a bodyguard.
As Gant fumbled with the gun, Janus shouted, “Gant! The hell are you doing?”
“Orders.” Gant aimed again as Janus held my arm tightly. If I fought, I’d blow our cover. If I didn’t, I’d be dead. I didn’t have to think too hard before Janus shoved me hard through the doorway, the shot smoking on the jamb. Janus lunged at Gant, throwing his weight behind the knife in his hand. It was so quick Gant only got off one more shot—in Janus’ chest. Gant was down, moaning without coherence. Janus came down hard to his knees, clutching the burned flesh in his chest. I saw his eyes and knew he loved me and just for that single moment I loved him, and he knew and he fell.
“Lalya, you gotta…” He couldn’t finish and didn’t have to for I could hear the shouts upstairs. I closed his eyes with my fingertips and fled to my speeder. I don’t think I was followed, or at least I made it out without anyone shooting at me. The dense grasses helped give cover, especially at night. I ditched the bike and waited in the red fields until morning when I could get myself back to a terminal safely.
When I had “reset” myself, I sent message to Lalya over a secure com channel but there was no reply. I don’t know if she made it through her other engagement or is just otherwise indisposed, but I still haven’t heard from her. |
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| Planning |
[Jun. 20th, 2005|05:47 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | hopeful | ] |
I had a busy night recently. A few of us (Pampi, Unfordive, Moone, and later Daarkke) held an impromptu meeting in the Bobcatt. I had only met Pampi once before and forgotten she is mute and only speaks lekku. Her protocol droid was having problems so I was translating for her. I had never met Moone before in person either, and he was very…intense. He’s a great asset to the House. Asiche has been gone for a while now, but we hear from him sporadically. Whispered rumors are linking Asiche with the old Jedi, which confuses me. Does anyone even still believe in that old religion?
At any rate, Moone really wants to keep the house active in the absence of two of its leaders. We’re holding a House Gathering that’s open to all Da’Vinci citizens next Sunday, June 26, at 8:00pm eastern time. We’d like to start having both formal and informal meetings on at least a weekly basis as well as hold large events to help attract people to our city.
I heard from Airell briefly. He’s alive, at least, and with some friends. He said he thought he’d be back in time for the Gathering, but I don’t care about all that as long as he gets home safely.
So I had something of an adventure with a client recently, but that’s a story for another day. |
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| Another day |
[Jun. 11th, 2005|04:11 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  lonely | ] |
There was an old man wandering around Da'Vinci in the dead of night while I was still up taking clients. Asiche seemed to think he knew him--some exiled wizard. Anyway, I had clients waiting. It's a good thing I got some extra chairs!
Airell's finally left. I wish I knew where he was going, or at least when he'll come back. He'll always do what he sees fit and I trust him unconditionally... But that doesn't mean he always takes the best care of himself. Culinary arts were never my specialty, but Airell never had to do anything. He's resourceful in a lot of other ways, though, just not so much with the keeping house.
I think I may stay in Theed for a few days. The cantina scene is a bit less dodgy there and it's a good place to advertise. I think I'm also meeting a client who wanted some help hunting 'lamas, which is right up my alley.
Deci wondered once why I didn't try to search for my family. Truly, I just never felt there was much need to. We were all bought and sold, resold and traded, and will continue to be. That's just the way things are... It's an industry like anything else. I seriously doubt the existence of records as to who my parents were, let alone where they were sold. I'm even only assuming I was born on Coruscant because that's the only place I ever remember. I was in a few different houses when I was very young, but they were always on Coruscant. There's a less than nonexistant chance records of my birth exist, other than the usual papers. I don't really know what my given name was, but the women in the first house took to calling me Kava'lyn, so that's the name I respoded to and adopted--but I digress. The point is if I've not been looking the roughly twenty years of my life, why start now? And even then, what good would it do? If my mother didn't raise me, is she really my mother? |
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| Questions |
[Jun. 9th, 2005|01:22 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  thoughtful | ] |
I met an Imperial today, a Colonel Decimus Jager. I'm not sure what to make of him. Deci's being very nice, but I don't think I can really trust him based on who my friends are--mostly smugglers when I think of it. Airell didn't seem to like the idea of him at all, though he didn't seem to care about his alignment.
Both Kora V'Tal and Airell are leaving soon. Airell, at least, will be back in a few weeks. I don't think we've been apat for more than a few days in the last couple years... Though once I didn't see him for four years straight, so this shouldn't be too bad. I remember missing him sometimes during that. He was the closest thing to family I'd ever had--and even then we were still a bit distant. At the time I was pretty much resigned to the fact that I'd never see him again and that he'd left Coruscant for good.
He came back eventually and took me with him, which was a pleasant turn of things--he freed me within the hour. I still don't know if he intended me to follow him, but came with him and have stood by him through all of his trouble with the Black Sun.
Last night he stayed with me until I was sleeping.
My house is starting to come together. The spaces have a definite "room" feel now. It's a nice space to have clients over--a little sterile but attractive in its simplicity. At least to me, but I'm no interior designer. I'm still not used to the bed, but I guess that will come in time.
An eventful day overall and I'm glad to have some rest. On the plus side, I got a new dressing gown. It's quite comfy, especially for the cool desert nights... |
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